Saturday, August 29, 2009

YES! No wait...Maybe? Oh forget it!

I have been sulking for the past week. I had everything in place to move us back "HOME"--a house, some money, school, people to help us, etc. when some lame-brained doctor decided to change my plans. Within 24 hours of having the first load of belongings headed for Colorado, HB's doctor notifies us that the best person for him to see is right over the mountain from where we are right now!

I am not going to pretend here, I AM NOT HAPPY! Some of you out there may not know this about me--other's of you have had the misfortune of knowing this about me--but when I am not happy about something I become terribly un-pretentious. I am a "no nonsense", up-front, "tell it like it REALLY is" kind of person anyway. BUT, when I am unhappy that part of my personality becomes painfully obvious. HB, knowing that my name means "Thunderbolt" in native american languages, has commented several times that he can see the "dark clouds" gathering above my head. He has been around long enough to know that when the "dark clouds" start gathering the "storm" isn't far behind. I spent most of this week pouting and crying and acting like a three year old. Then I spent two days feeling depressed. Today, I am beginning to feel slightly annoyed.

Ok! With that said, no, I am no longer moving back to Colorado anytime in the near future. I gave up the house I found, cancelled all of my plans and opportunities, and pouted about it all the way back from Colorado Wednesday night.

To make matters worse, my bestest best friend of almost 10 years went and did something stupid, hurt my feelings, and now we aren't on speaking terms. I am not usually one to hold a grudge, unless you really hurt my feelings and won't say you are sorry and try to fix it. Which she has no intention of doing because she thinks she is justified in what she did. WELL! At least I am no longer moving into a house right by hers! (I wonder how long I will have to give her the "silent treatment" before she pulls her head out of the clouds.)

Anyway, so you can see why I am feeling slightly annoyed today. Nothing seems to be going MY way right now. I don't know why I am fussing--nothing EVER goes my way. Which is why I do so much knitting. Knitting always goes my way!! (or it doesn't "go" at all!) I have made one and a half sweaters and spun up the yarn for socks and then knitted them up in only two weeks--and I work outside the house 45 hours a week. I have pictures of the first sweater, but haven't taken pictures of the socks or the progress on the other sweater yet. I will try to get the pictures of the completed sweater and socks on here by Monday.

I really don't know how the rest of the world copes with trials and troubles without knitting. Maybe the rest of the world doesn't have coping problems like I have......surely they have trials and troubles also. I do love my knitting and yarn and fiber. It is so predictable, soft, loyal, dependable, and available. It is always there for me when I need it. There to comfort me and tell me I can work through anything if I can work through a 12 color changing pair of Turkish Socks. If I can knit an icelandic sweater in the dark or with my eyes closed surely I can make it through living in Wyoming for a little longer? Yarn is such a good friend to me. Everytime I get even near a yarn store I can hear it calling to me, "Come see me. I will go home with you and be your best friend forever. I will never betray you or hurt your feelings. I will give you hours and hours of knitting pleasure and help you forget all your problems."

I really am not loosing it.......However, I am living in Wyoming so who know's!

1 comment:

Awesome Mom said...

Ugh that sucks. I think you have a right to pout for awhile. It has to stink to be jerked around like that.